ic contact;

[deadtective]

"Well, you reached me, but I'm obviously not answering right now. Leave a message and if I'm not avoiding you I'll get back as soon as I can."

Comments

TEXT; Backdated to the 7th

[unbreaker]

Hazel!

Haaaaaazel!

HAAAAAZZZELLLL!

[deadtective]

Uh. Yeah? Are you scared I forgot my name or something?

[unbreaker]

NO

i just wanted ur attention

what r u doing 2nite!!

[deadtective]

Yeah, I guess that ringtone wouldn't be attention-grabbing enough.

This Japanese rhythm game I've got downloaded on my phone is having an event, I'm probably going to spend most of the night racking up high scores. Why?

[unbreaker]

show me that later i wanna beat ur scores

[PRIORITIES!]

but srsly there's gonna be a bonfire at the beach in cape canaveral

wanted 2 know if u wanted to come with me?

[deadtective]

[joke's on you, Josuke, it's filled with cute anime idol girls. you can never beat her with that on her side!!!]

A bonfire? In February? Whose idea was that?

[casually sidestepping answering the question because....beach....beachwear???]

[unbreaker]

[...that's unfair. But he's still determined to try.]

...mine?

jeez u sound like kaneki "its 2 cold" its not that fuckin cold omg we're in florida

plus there's gonna be a FIRE. u know. as in bonFIRE. we'll be fine.

so r u gonna come along or what? u don't have 2 but i wanted 2 ask neway, ur fun 2 hang out with

[deadtective]

I can't feel any of that either way, I'm just pointing it out!! Your sense of timing is weird.

[HUFF PUFF but she deflates pretty quickly because compliments are her weakness]

Is this like a...real beach party? With beach party attire?

[unbreaker]

my sense of timing is awesome wth

[...]

idk, kaneki said he didn't want 2 swim so some of us might, some of us might not.

no one's gonna force u 2 do anything either way

[deadtective]

Well, no, of course they're not. I just don't want to be the weirdo skulking around in a hoodie while everyone else is in bikinis, that's all.

[unbreaker]

i'm not gonna b wearing a bikini so i think u'll b fine

[deadtective]

If you were even considering wearing a bikini I don't think I'd ever speak to you again.




Also if I find a spare one in your bag when I show up I'm leaving.

[unbreaker]

wow i like 2 think i dress better than my old man thnx

and can think of better pranks than that 2

[deadtective]

Why does your father wear women's swimwear.

[PRIORITIES]

[unbreaker]

ok srsly idk and i've been trying 2 figure that out

it's rly weird

[Okay, so Joseph doesn't REALLY wear women's swimwear (that he knows of) - that would be Dio - but the stuff he DOES wear is still really...weird. So he doesn't bother correcting Hazel.]

[deadtective]

Have you found any makeup in his room?? Because he might just be a drag queen or something.

[things she never thought she'd be suggesting, but text gives Hazel power and she can't stop herself from answering with her first thought]

[unbreaker]

i haven't been 2 his place yet!! what if that explains it

shit hazel wtf y would u tell me that now i can't unsee it adfkjdfasg

[deadtective]

You were the one that started it by mentioning him in the first place!!! And anyway you should know before you run into him all dolled up downtown one night!!

[unbreaker]

NO WAY THAT'D NEVER HAPPEN

[...it's so going to happen. And then Josuke will blame Hazel for it. She jinxed him.]

whatever just. come 2 the beach.

i think we're meeting at the porter in cape canaveral and heading out from there.

[deadtective]

[IT'S NOT HER FAULT FOR DROPPING MAD TRUTHS. also don't blame her send her pics instead so she can judge how good your dad is at drag.]

Ok, sure, that's fine. Do I have to bring anything besides myself?

[unbreaker]

i don't think so, i think we got everything else covered unless there's something u rly want 2 bring???

[deadtective]

You mean besides my dignity? Not especially.

[unbreaker]

no leave that at home who needs it

[deadtective]

I do. It is literally the only thing keeping my soul rooted to this chemical-infested husk.

[unbreaker]

i call bullshit